Thursday, July 17, 2008

Going corporate

Okay people, big changes going on here. Not really. Just one. And it's not that big. I don't think so, anyway, I can't even see it. You'll have to let me know. I've decided that so many faithful readers are seeing my blog everyday that it'd be practical to add adsense to it! I hope you're all as excited as I am. Pretty much, if you see a targeted ad that strikes you as amazing, you click it, and I get a quarter or something. Or if you're just feeling generous, click it for kicks. But I didn't say that. Cause you're not supposed to unless you're really considering the ad. But... I mean, there's no but... but there is... you know. Mostly I just think it's funny to have it there. And I wouldn't mind having an extra fifty cents around the house.

In other news, Reid started a blog, for those who know him. It's super thrilling. It's on my blog list. Don't forget. I look forward to his insights.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Guest speaking in my homeward

So I gave a talk today in church. My topic was something like "How the Lord changed your heart and turned you into a new person on you mission, and what you did before and during your mission to allow this to happen, and what you're doing now so that he can continue to do that." I was pretty iffy when I found that out, but it went okay. I think it was probably at least ten minutes instead of the required five. I also think it was probably the first time I've been a speaker in a sacrament with verses cut out of the intermediate hymn, and the last speaker cutting his remarks short. Anyway, it was grand.

I celebrated my success by being turned down by a girl. I think that brings my record since coming home to 2 dates requested and 3 rejections. Not bad, eh? So I walked out of priesthood minding my own business, headin' for home, and there was a girl in yon hallway on my way outside. She comments on my talk, I express my gratitude at her comment, and that was that. But she was walking towards the same door I was, still a ways away. So we walk... we turn a corner, she takes it kinda slow, so we end up pretty much side by side, with nothing to say to each other. So I ask how she's doing. She answers with "Pretty good, I just got a boyfriend on the fourth of July." What does a guy say to that? "Me too" or "Really? Cause I'm single" or "Well flip, I was just gonna ask you out after you moved out of my way so I could get to my truck and drive home to food and bed, but I guess I won't." I opted for "No kidding, happy holidays, huh?" and figured it couldn't get much more awkward so I added that "I haven't had a boyfriend for a really long time" just to see what happened. She laughed harder than the comment merited, as did I, and she walked to her car as I stepped around to get to mine and that was the end of the adventure.

Tanya suggests that next time that happens I say "Really? Well I'm getting married on Friday!" and really I'm hoping that I find myself in that situation at least once more just so I can say that. Come on BYU.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Way better than acupuncture!

So last night I go out to grab some Bottlecaps so I can properly enjoy my late night viewing of Miracle. No Bottlecaps at the store. But they do have 3 for $3 going on other movie box candy. Seriously, I saved like thirty cents, who could resist that? So I got some strawberry whoppers, some milkduds, and some Runts. Runts are a decent substitute for Bottlecaps, I feel.


I buy it all, I come home, I internet for a bit, I bed down and start enjoying my movie and the whoppers. I end up eating almost the entire box. Crazy. So I stop and eat some milkduds instead. Not a lot of them, but some. didn't touch the Runts.

I wake up this morning, and man do I need to brush my teeth. You wouldn't believe the intensity with which I needed to brush my teeth. I've also got some sort of cramping going on down in the ol' abdominal area. Not fun. As the day progresses I realize the negative feelings are going away. It felt like sin. I thought maybe eating whoppers was a sin. Then I remembered that they're just really unhealthy, and that's probably why my soul hurt. It just wouldn't go away, I brushed more, I ate healthy food, but I just wanted to give up and slothify myself the rest of the day. Which is pretty much what I did.

But I thought, after a while, upon my past experience with eating candy and watching movies long into the night. It had almost always been bottlecaps. So I try some Runts. And you know what? I felt better! I accidentally ate the entire box in a frightfully short amount of time, but I didn't feel sicker, I felt healthier! My soul was recovering! Soul food! Willy Wonka candy has medicinal properties, how about that! I couldn't keep this amazing find all to myself. It works at least with runts and bottlecaps. I don't know if that falls into western or eastern medicine, but dang it, it should fall somewhere, cause it works!

I just hope that somebody, somewhere out there can benefit from this unpleasantly earned knowledge. I know I will.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Lediga dagar...mums.

Someday I may well end up writing a children's book about the silly youth who wished it could be a day off every day, and that youth got his wish, and 365 days later he sure was glad to go back to work again. They say that's the way Christmas would work. I doubt it, but if it is, it's probably the way days off work too. I certainly hope I get the chance to find out one day. But not cause I can't get a job. Cause I don't need one. That's what I'd prefer. To not need a job.

Anyway, today was grand. I had the day off. You may well have surmised this already. So i woke up around 8:30 and was all pepped up for all the great things I'd accomplish. I deposited my paycheck successfully, that's about it. Went to Walmart for a new head for my electric toothbrush, but they didn't have the one I wanted. Seriously, Walmart, come on. So I came home and ate a box of Runts (mmm, health food) and fell asleep on the couch lying on my back. Then I woke up and tried to arise, but ending up sleeping on my right side. Then I woke up and tried to arise, but ended up sleeping on my left side. Then I woke up and succeeded in arising, and fell asleep on the couch upstairs instead. Stuff like this kept happening until about three hours had gone by, it was 4:00 when I finally finished sleeping. So then I tried to multitask to make up for lost time, didn't get much done, and decided to just officially take it easy the rest of the day. And I have. And it's been delightful.

And I finally figured out how to put videos on my blog, like as a feature of the blog, not part of a post. So I put one up. Rock on. It's a neat video. You should watch it. All two of you who read this. It's a good song. I'd sing it to my girlfriend, only excepting I don't have one. I don't even have two.